memories

first time : 7th sep 2013
met you after the via project at greenwhich with ur friends , it was such an awkwardly beautiful moment. clearly im aware that im saliva conscience , i drank from ur straw and ate from ur fork .u bought me "awfully choco's" chocolate cake . im pretty sure im deeply in love with u . caught u smoking , hurt so much but you always cheer me up in the end although u were the cause of me getting hurt time and again.

second time : tuesday on sep holiday week
met u after sch in my sch outfit ,  no sweaty hands , nothing . best feeling , such a happy time but u actually made me wait for u for almost an hour ? or was it longer :-( don't feel loved . went back to put my bag and change to slippers . we walked all around aimlessly and sat at the void deck in the end . sat there , extremely boring but yet entertaining becos im with u . played with ur shoe and in the end saw the palaroid in ur wallet , i felt like i was stabbed everywhere . it hurt me so much :-( felt worse , but the  memories i have is just perfect with u . u taught me how to erase the ants track and u kept touching my head which makes my heart beat ten times faster. we sat there and while i was trying to get back my wallet , i was leggit on u without knowing . u were so warm , i just wanted to lie on ur lap and fall asleep with u next to me , it started raining , we were stranded there and i was happy but i suppose that u wanted to leave . cuddles , hugs , u are perfect to me , the reason why i love u is all that we've been through. even though we didn't make it through , ill always be here for u . i love u bby :-(

third time : sunday night on sept holiday week
last min meet up again and ur friends were there . i had to smell the horrifying smoke but tried to avoid the smell , thank almighty God that u didn't smoke when i was with u . supreme shirt and acid light washed shorts . bus ride , u asked me to sit next to u , ur hand on my chair but not on my shoulder , heart beating fast X100 alr . u and ur friend were talking bout something then we went to eat ice cream , ur treat again , vanilla ice cream . u fed me when ur friend left and i was like leggit dying alr . took bus back , sat at the back of a merc benz bus . u placed ur over on my shoulder and touched my face and my lips . playing or do u really love me ? love me for me or ur ex...? i was so confused if u even have one in the first place.

24th sep (today) :
i miss him so much , i just wish he's sitting next to me and i can cuddle with him . it's so icy cold and he's body is so warm . i wanna b sunder his arms in such a temperature . i love u so much , i've been confused about so many things . i'm also dying to meet u but exa,s are here T.T im also dying to chat with u on tango or facetime , anything will do . listening ur voice , being next to u , talking to u and of course seeing u is my biggest wish apart from safety for everyone and to do well in my studies . i hop u do well and u can go to express and ill remain in normal academic and we get to go to the same jc or poly :-( please study hard and not be so naughty bby :-( although no one is even seeing this ... i love u bby , i miss ur sweet mesasages , calling me ur princess was the best gift i've ever received. maybe ill invite u over for christmas ? maybe maybe i miss u bby i miss u so bloody much i wanna just cry now. love you bby bi really do T.T sorry for being me , im not worth ur love i guess . please dont play with me :-( ill be broken even more if u hurt me cos u mean so much to me now . i love u so much i really do